We finally did it.

We finally caught a phone deal at the right time and although I missed out on the "ideal" plan that I had in mind before, the one we settled on comes out a bit cheaper than the previous one so PiC and I have consolidated ourselves from a three service group (each of us and my parents) to one single carrier, upgrading him to a smartphone in the process.

Our two smartphones are free, and thanks to a corporate discount, the activation fees were waived ($35/each) and we get a 10% discount on the phone-only parts of the plan.

We have unlimited data, although only the first 2Gs are high-speed.  After that, they throttle the speed, but so far, it doesn't seem like we even come close to using a G each in a month.

It might have been a mistake to just go with PiC's phone choice, though. He picked the G2 which was free with a 2 year plan and he liked that it came with the slide out keyboard.  That's perfect for him but with small hands and a very differently configured touchscreen in combination with the very thick phone and case, I still can't adjust to either option and typing has become a huge chore.  I'm frequently tapping away while walking and grumbling: "I hate you!" as I make mistakes.

Interruption: I caved. I found another touchscreen sans slideout keyboard option for free and quickly called for a buyer's remorse exchange.  Thanks to a quick on the trigger CSR, though, the order was put through without overnight shipping which I was willing to pay for at $12.  Unless UPS works a whippy shippy by Friday, I'm traveling over the holiday weekend without a phone since this one has to go back by Friday. That'll be a challenge to coordinate.

Ah well.

Back to the good stuff. We're now paying, after taxes, around $150 for four phones, two with data, two without, unlimited texts for all, 1000 minutes between the four of us.  We were paying something like $210 across three carriers for three dumb phones, all falling apart, and 1 smartphone that didn't work 80% of the time. It's not an enormous savings but it will add up and so long as I can get back to functioning, we'll all be the happier for it. ;)

Borrowed from a free Owly comic, one of the most expressive non-verbal books I've ever had the pleasure of "reading."

My oldest friend, measured by years we've known each other, not by her age, was feted recently.  She's expecting her first baby and we both traveled fair distances to meet each other for this event.  I can't remember the last time we were able to spend time together.

That's always been the story of our friendship, actually.

We met as children of primary school age, then separated by district lines until that same bureaucracy funneled us back into the same schools.  Through high school we remained good friends, despite sharing few classes.  We had little in common other than a drip of superficially similar background but we fit like two bits of puzzle without jostling, always kindred spirits, always loyal, no matter how long since last contact.  It's the kind of relationship that doesn't needa crisis or a reason to prove that it exists.

In the years following, her faith and our lives have taken dramatically different directions and yet neither of us have felt any distance grow between us.  No moss has overgrown our friendship; no differences diminish the value of our connection.

And so, with the coming of her baby ever-imminent, PiC and I headed down south so I could spend this joyful time with her.  Now typically, I'm a bit of a groaner when it comes to these things.  I hate them, to be honest, having been to so many bloodless affairs. Wedding and baby showers can tend to become gift grabs when all and sundry are invited, fancied up for the look of the thing, and frankly, I tired of it long ago.

But this shower was a labor of love by her other closest friend who hosts beautifully and thoughtfully.  The guest list was a small, curated mix of close family, family friends, and dear friends, and the mum-to-be was able to spend good quality time with most of the attendees such that everyone who traveled was able to share some wisdom and laughter.  The food was delicious - always important - and plentiful, and the guests all seemed relaxed and comfortable.

She and I saw the guests off and stayed well after to help clean up, spend time with the hostess and her family, and we later packed her gifts for her travel back.  Despite being quite far along, she was doing the dishes while I cleared the table, dried the dishes, and watched the kids. Clearly, my friend is not a brat and we're still a good team.  We later spent a good half day together catching up and running other errands.

I spent $100 on the shower, for gifts on and off-registry, lunch, and gas (because she generously offered to be the driver during our post-shower bonding time), not counting travel costs to SoCal. We noticed that it's a funny thing with babies that people can't resist buying all kinds of things so you go off-registry so easily.  Guilty.

But, look, I'm not going to get to see my niece or nephew related by long-time friendship much so I have to start the nerding-by-osmosis early and often: books and bonds!  My favorite gift to the baby was a black and white Owly book. Mama-to-be says black and white is supposed to stimulate the baby's brain.  Favorite gift for me was Mama-to-be assuring me that yes, if I *had* gotten her child superhero underpants, the baby would have worn them.  (Guess what I'm going to buy next?)

I also brought back a few offers to help with wedding planning from old friends I hadn't seen in ages which was really generous and a possible line on other wedding related stuff.  It was one of my best trips back down south in a really long time.

Doggle's Details, continued.

Now that I've shocked and appalled you all with the high cost of living in California, and particularly in Northern California... ;)
 
I've never paid more than $50 to adopt a pet, and rarely even that much, in the past, so this adoption was quite a bit unusual in a number of ways.

I have never considered purchasing from a breeder or a pet store - my philosophy against that is clear.  Those future pets will eventually find homes because they were bred with the intent to be sold and someone has a vested interest in placing them elsewhere; animals in shelters and rescues are only a step away from euthanasia. I am an adopter, always. I was that kid hauling home strays trying to figure out who they belonged to and how to get them home if they had a home. Once in a rare while, we would become the new home.  My parents were sympathetic but they weren't crazy or wealthy so it was a meal and a roof until the dog could be placed somehow.

It was a lot easier, back in the day down south, when we had a yard.  Someone was sort of always around to keep an eye on the pups running around or keep them separated if you had a new stray in. Surrounded by friends and family nearby, you could even easily phone someone for a quick drop in if you really had to on an extra busy day to feed the dog(s).  We never did that but you always knew the safety net was there.

Now, though, PiC and I wanting to bring home a dog is a very different story. The simple lack of a yard alone changes the game entirely.  Add in the frequently inclement weather, our working hours and commute times, all of these spelled out a need for a completely different approach.

Suddenly, we had to satisfy a profile if this was to work.  We couldn't just pick a nice looking friendly pup and call it a day. We especially couldn't have a puppy: they need attention, socialization, training, access to the outdoors/potty pads every few hours while they're learning bladder control since neither of us wants to have to unteach bad habits we helped instill.

I'd been wanting an older dog; PiC prefers larger dogs.  We knew we needed a dog that enjoyed going for walks but could tolerate being indoors for long periods of time.  This dog had to be dog-friendly and kid-friendly because there are loads of both running around here, and not a barker by nature. We've been living with a barker below us and it's driving us batty but we tolerate it.  I guarantee you, however, that the neighbors would not be so tolerant in return. There are some incredibly petty people in this HOA.

Looking at shelters alone didn't quite cut it. While they were great starting points because they had all kinds of lovely dogs we were limited from the outset against adopting specific breeds, and the local shelter is heavily stocked with those specific breeds. My favorites were cut straightaway, the jerks! They don't allow Rottweilers, Pit Bulls, Dobermanns, etc.  Breedists. I despise blanket restrictions like that. I love dogs of just about any breed and pit bulls especially because they can be so very good-tempered, intelligent and trainable, and the local shelters prescribe mandatory training classes when they adopt out pit bulls which is absolutely smart, so it's a great set-up for their lives, but noooo.... *still bitter about this*

We stumbled across a specific breed rescue that pulls northern breeds from shelters and puts them into foster homes directly, and while Doggle's actually not really a pinpointable member of any of the breeds they cater to, he's close enough that they couldn't resist him.

He'd been with them a year, had a surgical procedure and follow-up, vaccinations, a microchip placed, and was mellow the whole time.  Reviewing that year with him, his foster mom was able to give us his history of behavior, preferences, reactions to people, other dogs, changes, diet, toys, length of time he was happy to be left alone - all of this practically before we ever came to see him.  When we met him, he was this chubby cheeked cheerful fellow that just radiated curiosity and goodwill. He's been that way ever since.  It would have been tough to get that consistent and detailed a perspective from most shelters.

While our local shelter does do fostering and would have been half the price, they didn't have anyone that fit enough of the profile that wasn't a Pit.  (I love our Doggle and wouldn't trade him but I'm still annoyed on behalf of the Pits who won't get placed because of places like ours.) I truly look forward to moving into a home where the only rules are our own: a dog that is in need of a home, trainable and gets along with other dogs and people.

The high(er) cost for his adoption, then, was because of the rescue organization that we went with.  They are non-profit, yes, and it also costs a lot to rescue, care for and maintain the dogs for the length of time it takes to get them to their permanent homes.  All the volunteers, going all the way up to the top of the organization, work for free. (I checked.) While I'm not one to pay a higher price for perceived value, this was a higher price for something we put a high premium on: knowledge that we could rely on and the availability of a pet that was the right fit.

Also, let's not kid ourselves about the cute factor. 

Welcome, one and all, to the surprise edition of the Carnival of Personal Finance.  In life, there are always plenty of surprises. Whether you're pleased or or disgruntled by them, however, depends on the surprise, doesn't it?


Fanny from Living Richly on a Budget presents Life After College: 5 Finance Tips for Graduates

Jason from Live Real, Now presents 5 Reasons Your Wealth Isn’t Growing

Darwin from Darwin's Money presents Disturbing Study: Americans Are HORRIBLE With Money – The Stats

Kay Lynn Akers from Bucksome Boomer presents How Do You Earn Your Money?

Tom from Stupid Cents presents 401k Beneficiary: All About 401k Beneficiaries

Jim from Bargaineering presents Homemade Laundry Detergent

Money Beagle from Money Beagle presents Healthy Kids Yogurt That's Half The Price!

Beating Broke from Beating Broke presents Opportunity Cost is Bull

Kim LaCapria from TotallyMoney presents Secret tips for budget-friendly dinner parties

Nicole from Nicole and Maggie: Grumpy Rumblings presents In praise of mending

Ryan from The Financial Student presents Living At Home Comes With Its Own Costs

Sustainable PF from Sustainable Personal Finance presents Sustainability Tip #159: Use a Commercial Car Wash

MBHunter from Mighty Bargain Hunter presents Merchants could take it on the chin for using Groupon. Should you care?

Meghan from CreditDonkey presents Dos and Don't of Summer Road Trips

Sun from The Sun's Financial Diary presents Will Closing a Credit Card Improve Credit Score?

Amanda from My Dollar Plan presents 6 Defects Our Detail-Oriented Home Inspector Missed

Bret from Hope to Prosper presents Real Estate 101 - Investment Property

Kim McGrigg from Blogging for Change presents How to rent when you have bad credit

Len Penzo from Len Penzo dot Com presents If It Feels Good Do It: Maybe Strategic Defaults Aren't So Bad After All

Tim Chen from NerdWallet Credit Card Watch presents What are the Best Store Credit Cards? (We Compare 18)


Dan from ETFBase presents 10 Dow Stocks Yielding over 3% – But How’s the Performance of Dow Dogs?

D4L from Dividend Growth Stocks presents 7 Undervalued, Big-Name Stocks To Consider For Your Dividend Portfolio

Control Your Cash from Control Your Cash presents My Bank! My Precious Bank!

Teacher Man from My University Money presents Investing Series - Part 2

Matt from Dividend Monk presents Brookfield Infrastructure Partners Analysis

Mike from Green Panda Treehouse presents Life Insurance: When and Why

IS from Intelligent Speculator presents Brazil, A Great Investment To Add To Your Portfolio?

Div Guy from The Dividend Guy Blog presents Playing With Ex-Dividend Date

Dividend Growth Investor from Dividend Growth Investor presents Dividend Investing in a Low Interest Rate Environment

Kevin Mulligan from RothIRA.com Blog presents The Risk of Variable Annuities

Pfblogger from Personal cents presents Switching 401ks

Philip Taylor from PT Money Personal Finance presents Betterment Review: We're All Investors Now

Ben from Money Smart Life presents How to Track Your Investments

Bob from Christian Personal Finance presents How To Network As A Business Owner

Mike from The Financial Blogger presents How I Went From 30k to 100k in 5 Years

Lahesha Williams from Career Help for Christians presents 5 Ways To Find Work In A Tough Job Market

Crystal from Budgeting in the Fun Stuff presents Ten Money Tips For Students and Recent Grads

Junior Boomer from Consumer Boomer presents 27 Tax Law Changes for 2011

Philip Taylor from Outlaw Finance presents 5 Ways Kids Can Help Lower Your Tax Bill

Echo from Boomer & Echo presents Why I Love Shopping At Costco

Diva from Diva In Debt presents What Every Girl Needs: Walk Away Money aka Emergency Fund

Miranda from Money Crashers presents Divorce Process & Finances: How to Protect Yourself Financially When Getting a Divorce

Big Cajun Man from THE Canadian Personal Finance Blog presents You Need a New Set of Expensive Golfclubs

Jacob @ My Personal Finance Journey from My Personal Finance Journey presents If We Could Have One Financial Do-Over...

Glen Craig from Free From Broke presents What Is a Probate Lawyer and When Would You Use One?

Squirrelers from Squirrelers presents Could You Easily Cover a Sudden, Unexpected $2000 Expense?

Jason from One Money Design presents http://www.onemoneydesign.com/is-the-lottery-a-good-idea/

Jim Yih from Retire Happy Blog presents Do you BELIEVE you can become wealthy?

ElizabethG (Modern Gal) from Modern Gal presents Dealing with Big Financial Differences

Annabelle from The Year of Shopping Detox presents Day 159: Nobody cares about coins anymore

Justin from Money Is The Root presents Don't Think it Can Happen to You?

Financial Uproar from Financial Uproar presents Are Experiences The New Stuff?

Dr. Dean from The Millionaire Nurse Blog presents The Debt Ceiling Controversy: Why You Should Care!

No Debt MBA from No Debt MBA presents Why Student Loans are the Worst Kind of Debt

Matt Bell from Matt About Money presents How to Mess Up Your Financial Life

Well Heeled from Well Heeled Blog presents Why is Travel The Holy Grail of Personal Finance Spending?

Mike from Experiglot presents The $100 Swing

Revanche from A Gai Shan Life presents Doggle: The True Costs of Our New Pet

Niki from Debt Free By Thirty presents Discussions on Materialism

Money Thinker from Money Thinking presents 10 Things to Double Check Before Buying a Used Car

Tom Drake from Canadian Finance Blog presents What Do Garage Sales Teach Us About Money?

Thank you to all the participants, both for their entries and for their patience.  Please be sure to submit the very best of your articles to next week's Carnival when it is hosted by Tom of Stupid Cents. 

I feel like we've had our Doggle for ages. In reality, it's only been a few weeks so it's a good time to see for the best to start counting up the first month costs to see the damages in stark bleeding red.  Just in case anyone was under any illusions about how "fun" and "exciting" and "easy" it would be to adopt a pet. ;)

Our tab started at $290 from the gate, and that was before any creature comforts for our new beloved beastie.

With that in mind, and my off the cuff refusal to spend $500 in the first month of dog ownership, my (insane) quest was to gather all the most needed things on the list for under $100 since we still had to visit the vet, he had some meds to continue, and a license to obtain.

We were lucky that he's generally so low maintenance in the daily-occupation department.  He hasn't been a toy-loving pup, he's uniformly ignored them at his foster mum's for the past several months and other dog companionship isn't terribly important to him either. I don't have to feel guilty that he's not getting a sibling any time soon! Turns out, dog stuff has gotten much more expensive since I last shopped for it.

The list of Stuff:

1. A bed: he squished the life out of a gifted bed with all his huffy-puffy flopping (see below) so he needed a secondary. 
2. 2  1 leashes (I normally keep a backup and he's still learning leash manners so we may eventually own 2. Will just buy one for now). $20, plus tax
3. A secondary collar for training, $21, plus tax
4. Food, $30
5. A car hammock, the interim solution instead of a new car. $40, plus tax
6. Food and water bowls. $30, elevated bowls as he's an older, taller dog
7. Shampoo
8. Comb & Brush. $19
9. A tie down $18
Total:  $250

That's a pretty spectacular fail on the budgeting front.  Economizing on the really little things, we don't actually need a second leash - he's a puller but not out of control. He had a grooming right before we picked him up so I opted out of buying shampoo, I'll be brushing him out regularly and since PiC really doesn't want his fur stopping up the drains (he's got some mega-thick fur that clumps) and we don't have a yard, we'll be bathing him at the local Pet Food Expresses. Oh. Yes.

Baths: $45 for 4.

By the by, my pricematching reveals that Amazon is failing spectacularly where it was once brilliant at undercutting the B&M retailers on many of these items.

His visit to the vet included an exam, baseline bloodwork because of some previous history, medications, vaccinations, treatment and came out to: $250.

Three weeks in, and we've clocked $835 on the dog cost meter.  We still have licensing to go but that won't be more than $36.  If PiC was unconvinced before about my setting the emergency and maintenance fund at a $5,000 minimum, he's come over now.  I'm about to kick that up to $10,000 at this rate!

Because this guy is older, and has had at least one questionable bit of medical history, he's more prone to the age-related illnesses. The visit was only up about $80 due to the medical history and not really an age thing, though, any dog with  Of course, we are already ridiculously attached to him, and it makes sense to set aside a huge e-fund for him. I'm not willing to make serious medical decisions based solely on finances.


As to the Doggle himself, he's been a hoot. He's been with us visiting family and friends, north and south, and he's been coming out of his shell with each step. The lucky fella was gifted a bed and bag of goodies on his first day home by our fellow dog loving blogger friends and he's slowly deciding that chewies are good times. But already he's getting curfewed - no chewies after 10 pm.  

He's trying to train us, particularly his Alpha human, that packs must always travel together and therefore bedtime is the same for everyone.  Safety issue, perhaps?

He'll go stare at PiC, wagging his tail slowly, a grin on his face, turn and pace to bed, whoomp into his bed.  Wait fifteen seconds to see if it worked. PiC doesn't appear? Repeat. Over and over and over ... and over.  Night after night, he tries to wheedle PiC to conformity.  This tactic literally smooshes the stuffing out of his beds.  (And does not work as PiC is not trainable.)

It's entertaining because he doesn't whine, bark, growl or otherwise vocalize frustration.  Just whoomps wherever he's making his stand.  He's pretty great all around, truth be told, mostly quiet, though almost puppy-like on occasion when he catches a scent or sees a smaller dog he'd really like to meet.  Good with strangers, people or canine, he's like a cat during the day, hanging out while we work and morphs back to a goofy dog, loping over pleased as punch to see us when we come home at night.  He was definitely not a fan of the air dryer when we bathed him and probably not so much of being washed in loads of soapy water for fifteen minutes either but he still let us do our thing without making any real fuss.

I've been evil ear lady since he came home, and though he almost matches me pound for pound, I can basically - under protest - clean and medicate his ear solo. We wrassle, but I still get the job done between an iron grip and a strategically broken up Pupperoni stick.

It's been a huge change working our lives around his needs. His routine is our new routine, he has to go out twice a day because we have no yard, and we are learning how to live with a new family member whose needs we have to plan around. But to be perfectly honest, he's been well worth it. Even if we do Swiffer three times a day now. ;)

Over the years, I've been witness to a great many friends and family pledging their troths, and in the planning processes, not too many of them have gone the way of the 'zilla: Bride, Mother, or Groom Edition, but there have been a few.  As we get older and wiser, some of us are getting cranky and less tolerant of these behaviors.  We certainly are no longer willing to entertain the demands when they've blasted beyond the boundaries of sanity.

While it's wonderful to share this day of joy with your family and friends, and it's even more joyful if they can participate if they can offer their love and skills with you, there comes a time when you've created an indentured servant of your friend or loved one and it's time to stop the madness.

Happily, selfishly happily, I've only been observing the latest dramas from afar and shaking my head but I can say that without a doubt a compleat set of poor performance has been displayed by someone I thought I knew and it's quite disappointing.  We wonder if this will wear off post-wedding - I sure hope so as I imagine there's no excuse to act like this afterward!

As witness.... 

* Inviting your bridal party to every one of your serial wedding shower events, and telling them they must buy you a gift for every one of the events - Not Kosher.

* Telling a dear friend who has lovingly created a piece of art you commissioned that you plan to use for an integral part of the wedding that everyone will see that you'd "rather pay for those materials so that he/she 'can buy you a real gift'" - Not Kosher

* Sending people back of beyond to select flowers in the perfect shade of "your color" for one of your celebratory events that's not actually the wedding - Not Kosher

* I couldn't say that doing the above for the wedding itself was Kosher, either.  But I would expect you to order your flowers from someone you pay to abuse like so.

* Insisting that people follow your schedule for six-nine months before the wedding, the whole time block, for everything you deem important to the planning process - Not Kosher

* Asking for favor, upon favor, upon favor - should not ever be couched as a demand. Or a right. I don't care how "bestie of bestie friends" you are.  You're asking for favors. Their time, skills and resources do not actually belong to you.

* Asking your bridal party what their budgets are for dresses and then demanding that they buy dresses precisely four times that amount will break something.

* Telling your invitation designer to go back and change the design again after you've gotten specially sized envelopes, special card stock and a specific design on no budget because your sketch would look really cool on there - Not Kosher

Conversely?  

* Don't offer yourself up to do favors for people endlessly and then be angry or put off when people take you up on it, ever.  The people you whine to then are the same people you whined to before when you weren't being asked to do things. We hear both sets of whining.

* Don't offer your professional services as a gift, and then sit down at the table after failing to render a service to negotiate a fee.

* Don't insist that you have to be kept apprised of everything but never respond to any updates or requests for input.

* Insisting that your way is the only way and then completely failing to contribute to making your way work by reason of absenteeism, lack of communication, sulking or alcohol - Not Kosher


Shaking our heads over the latest spate, a good friend of mine has firmly stated her adult life rule: I don't have room in my life for this.  He/she and I were never close and this confirms that that couple is now on that short list of people I just don't need.

Have you been trounced or bounced about in a similar game of My Life is More Important Than Yours?  Would you, like my friend, draw a line and say Enough?