The slight uptick is due to gains in the market, so I'm not going to get excited about "progress" just yet, I won't trust that these gains will hold.

More bills are coming down the pipeline: we had to replace the last tire standing this weekend. By that I mean, the sole tire that didn't ever get replaced during the time my mum was damaging tires right and left finally gave up the ghost.

The hunt for a printer all-in-one remains in force; it's darn near impossible to find a smaller sized machine that is wireless, has an auto-doc feeder, and is reasonably priced. Aggravatory. Then again, the search precluded HP models based on reader and friend feedback, it might be time to remove that injunction.

Oh and of course the net cost of the Miami weekend has yet to bite the pocketbook. Much of the trip was subsidized, my portion was small, but it's still another little fishie nibbling away at the cash reserves.

Southern California's on fire again, and not in a good way. (Is it ever?) Between the fires and the over 100 degree heat, we've done surprisingly well in not using the a/c. Shading the windows, fans and letting in the coolth from the early mornings keeps the house tolerable. We may survive this summer yet!

Stretchy Dollar hosts this week's Carnival of Personal Finance: the History of College Football Edition.

Mosey on over and take a look!

I like that J. Money's lapse in hygiene nabs an Editor's Pick slot: Automation and Forgetting to Brush My Teeth

:)

I really like MoneyMonk's question in this post:


She lists the following "order of financial sources."

1. Emergency Fund
2. Family/friends
3. HELOC
4. Credit card
5. 401k

Mine is a pretty short list, and doesn't include credit cards because that's just borrowing trouble that I might not be able to pay back:

1. Sell stuff, freelance work if poss
2. Cash
3. Roth IRA
4. 403(b)/401(a)
5. I have one relative I might be able to borrow money from, but I seriously doubt I'd ask her unless things were dire. She's not exactly the best money manager, we're just close enough to give each other money if necessary.

What does your list look like?

[via Jonathon at My Money Blog]

This is a targeted promotion for Chase customers: Customers who set up automatic billing for one bill get $10, and a second $10 for setting up two bills.

Take a look at chase.com/get20 to see if you qualify.

I'm in CA, am an existing Chase/WAMU customer, and did not qualify.

It's been a while since I've had reason to CVS or Walgreens (esp now that WG no longer has their FAR program), but I haven't lost my appreciation of a good deal.

To go you one better, MoneyMateKate is combining good deals with good deeds: the products of her coupon/bargain labor goes to the needy of NYC in the form of Care Packages. She's expanding her couponing efforts, and if anyone can help her with packets of coupons, they'd be much appreciated. (Mine is in the mail, Kate!)

Take a look at this post which explains her coupon needs, and continue to follow her adventures as she scoops up merchandise for nearly or all the way free to share with those less fortunate.

In this prolonged recession, I'm sure that many are grateful for the basic necessities she's provided since the usual channels for charity have been overwhelmed with more supplicants than donors. It's a great way to give, doesn't take much more than some minimal effort on your part to print and mail, or clip and mail, the coupons and directly goes into the hands of people in need.

She's also fun and entertaining when she's not couponing, so you should follow her if you don't already, anyway! :)

Just when I'd gotten the whole anti-wedding rant out of my system, we're confronted with a rather astounding creature: the only child, Miami bride who is marrying our dear friend.

Full disclosure: Literally the only things we know about this individual is that a) she's an only child, b) she evidently likes him pudgy, and c) our friend is staying in Florida to be with her.

But if we may amateurishly practice the art of psychological profiling via behavioral observation to ascertain a little more about this mystery woman, let's do!

Tell me, folks, what make you of this?

No registry information was listed in the invitation. The invite itself was classy, understated, printed on VERY nice card stock that shimmered. Since we're associated on the groom's side, there was no handy brides/maid of honor/bridesmaid grapevine from which to glean the shopping 411. Normally, I just give cash. But since we're flying out there, we're already spending a whole heck of a lot of money and frankly, I'd rather find a good deal that costs less than the $200 cash we'd feel obligated to give.

I cracked my knuckles (not really, I hate the sound of that) and went to work online. My first foray was to the Macy*s gift registry because what couple doesn't register there?

And my-my-my! I had to double check the date to make sure we really ARE still in a recession. Also, I know our friend and he's an REI dude. Like, a dude who has seen fine china but would be hard-pressed to identify the various implements and doodads involved in fine dining. I'm just going to go whole hog on the assumptions here and guess she never let him handle the registry gun but once.

A sampling for your pleasure:

Every single piece of Kate Spade china and flatware made or sold by Macy*s
~ A Platinum teapot -- $238
~ A sugar bowl -- $105
~ A salt and pepper shaker set -- $82
~ A Platinum creamer -- $90
~ A gravy boat and platter -- $180

Every appliance known to man, platinum pricing
~ DeLonghi coffeemaker -- $375
~ DeLonghi espresso maker -- $140

Bedding must not be neglected ~ Hotel collection comforter -- $760 [someone actually purchased this, btw]
~ Duvet -- $470
~ Sheets (5 sets) -- $95/each
~ Pillowcases (2 sets) -- $95 each
~ Pillows -- $220

Does it surprise you that my next hunch also panned out? Where else would this couple be registered? Bloomingdale's? YES. Target? NO.

At Bloomie's, we're Monique Lhullier all the way:
~ 5 pc place setting, we'd like ten -- $140 each
~ Creamer -- $115
~ soup bowls, we'd like ten -- $80 each

And Vera Wang for the flatware, of course.

Our friend is not in a profession where he's going to be pulling down six figures a year, ever, so my faint hope is that she either simply is unaware that some of us po' folk can't spend rent money on a few objets d'art for the kitchen, bathroom or bedroom, or that she's tailoring the registry to the style her friends and family are accustomed to giving. I find the latter hard to believe, though, because the wedding's in three days and most of those selections are still wide open for purchase.

Whatever the reason, the registry seems to imply that this lady is waaaay out of his income league, and I can only cross my fingers that Daddy or Mommy's money will be subsidizing their lifestyle if this demonstrates her idea of normal.

By the by? I did check REI. And Bed, Bath and Beyond. And Linens'n'Things. Nope on every single one.

I finally did find a decent combination of kitchenware that wouldn't break the bank, found a 10% off coupon via retailmenot.com, and added a little ebates.com action to boot. All told, with gift wrap, it'll be about $75 which is still way too much for a few baking pans. But what did they really expect? A bi-coastal wedding and they registered for nearly all $100+ items? *sigh*

Emotionally, when is it worth it to you to spend money to save time (sanity)?

Shopping for shoes on a tight budget is no joke, and flying wingwoman on a bargain hunt is usually my thing .... BUT .... after a particularly draining and unproductive 6 hour shopping trip through 4 enormous big-box discount shoe stores 17 months ago for a friend, I swore off in-store shoe shopping for the next three lifetimes. Very dramatic, yes. But Lordy!

We walked miles through soulless outlet malls, made all the more torturous by the hordes of screaming children and No Good Shoes. If we'd walked out of there with a halfway decent bargain, I would have been over the moon. As it was, we only found a single decent pair of shoes to even try and they were way out of her budget.

Recently, my only chance to spend some time with another girlfriend was to join her shoe shopping expedition. Teeth gritted, I agreed, lacing up my comfy new running shoes and lightening my pockets of anything that might weigh down my aching bones. "Haven't seen her in over a year," I grumped, "probably won't get another chance before June next year."

She picked a rather obscure (to me) shop, a wee little bit of a specialty shop, and didn't name any other destinations when we set the itinerary. Another shrug from me, and off we went.

To my surprise, she spotted over a dozen pairs of possibilities in our first pass. That's more than I see in full search of any run-of-the-mill DSW or Nordstrom Rack! (Then again, if I were the buyer, they would all have been eliminated on price alone. The cheapest regularly priced pair was $68!) My only job was to evaluate the look of the shoe, sitting on a comfortable couch, as the sales assistants brought wave after wave of shoeboxes. All told, she must have gone through 30 pairs, and they were unfailingly courteous and reasonably attentive.

After nearly three hours of sitting and chatting, lacing new pairs, and restuffing the unwanted shoes, she picked her favorite pair and paid $75 for them. As we sat and caught up over coffee and lemonade, I had a rather discomfiting sense that as a bargain shopper, I may have reached my emotional limit on the subject of shoes.

Once upon a time, not too long ago, I prided myself on finding a good deal on anything I bought, ever. Now, I might just hate fruitless shoe hunting enough to be willing to pony up full price on a comfortable, high-quality pair of shoes.

Honestly, that's sort of disappointing. It's not so much an unwillingness to sacrifice on quality by paying lower prices for a cheaper good. I just can't stand the process! Seems like a wuss of a cop-out.

After years of business travel, you'd think my packing skills would be solid. Guess that only applies if you're paying attention!

For a week-long trip to a clime easily thirty degrees cooler than home, I packed two pairs of jeans, a long sleeved shirt, a few short sleeved shirts and a couple light cardigans. They can barely even be called sweaters because they're super lightweight and one is cropped.

Then, it all went into an enormous tote. Great for avoiding baggage fees, terrible for day trips into the metro area or going out for meals. It's half my size!

I wasn't planning to shop, so I'm doing my level best to avoid buying warm clothing, a lightweight travel purse that scrunches down easily, and a pair of shiny leggings a la Flashdance. Wait wait, no no, not shiny leggings. Just regular ones so that if I end up going horseback riding ... or given the state of my hands, horseback sitting.... my knees won't be terribly abused by the seams of my jeans.

Actually, I'm skipping the horsey sidetrip entirely because I'd need appropriate pants and boots, neither of which came with me.

Lack of preparedness, folks, it can destroy your budget in a BIG WAY. I've made do so far, but feeling deprived (and COLD), I could so easily have bought three different sweaters and extra shoes that I'd ultimately be annoyed about packmuling home.

Adam of Your Money Relationship hosts this week's Carnival of Personal Finance #219, the Little League edition.

Be sure to check it out!

I've said it before, I'm against the maxi dress. But according to, uh, FINAL SALE [stamped on the receipt, thanks BCBG!], I'm stuck with this one. Nevertheless, I need to know which of the two above choices should be worn on a night out in Miami - clubbing optional - and if the maxi dress could be appropriate for the actual mid-afternoon wedding.

The orangey dress is very much like something Fiona would wear ... so it feels like it's right for Miami, but it was a bit pricey. And it has pockets!

Ehhh ... I dunno. But what do I know? I'm no fashion maven and y'all already know that. Help?

What's better than not spending?

Making up for past stupid spending!

I pled my rheumatically, unemployed case with the hotel, and the woman I spoke with was kind enough to cut me some slack. Some $40 slack! I was polite, acknowledged that the ball had been dropped on my end entirely, but asked for a bit of consideration due to extenuating circumstances, and she obliged.

They're back, now.

As a former FatWallet Grocery Forum frequenter, and a fairly avid couponer for some years, I
know the value of a price point. Knowing the best price you should get for products keeps shopping levelheaded and budget-friendly. Even if the gimmes strike, the impulse buys are tempered by the internal price book. [Or the little black book where the best TP prices (after double coupon and sale) are recorded.]

For example, $3.99 is the usual price for a pound of asparagus: too much. When stores are motivated to move the asparagus, they'll sell for as little as 99 cents per 1-lb bundle. That's usually the lowest the supermarkets go around here, so $1.99 is an acceptable off-season price when the pantry is decidedly starch and protein-heavy.

For other products, clothing, accessories and the like: almost-broke student budgety price points. There are slight variations depending on the merchant, ie: Target versus department stores. Still, that doesn't excuse the Macy's version of merchandising where a junior's day dress might be priced anywhere from $60-$100. In my book, page 4 of the Clothing section, that's a no go since when the sales and coupons roll around? You can get those very same dresses, assuming your sizes are still available, for as low as $12-$16! Dresses are not a necessity, I'm willing to take the risk.

My few purchases before the layoff, though, whew! I upsold myself in Richter scale fashion.

• There was the much beloved bag purchase several months ago for 60% off = still above my price point by a factor of ten.
• There was the dress from Gilt.com [$150], plus the cost of tailoring [?].
• There was the bespoke dress from a dressmaker on Etsy [$192], which also required tailoring [$22].

And there's the netbook I've been yearning after. Priced out at~$400, I'm still safe from that imprudent purchase, but all the travel of late had got me thinking that $200 was a reasonable price. [As my friend said about a shoulder bag, "if you like it." Um, what?? It's a purse!]

Granted, the netbook is a piece of technology so it'll cost more than Payless shoes, but when on earth did my price points migrate to "$200 is an acceptable price" on more than just electronics?

(I can't even blame it on the Recessionary Sales a la Free Money Finance.)

Well, I'm just glad they're back now, I can't afford that luxuriant lifestyle quite yet!

Has anyone out there got experience they'd like to share about their printer all-in-one favorites or least favs?

As much as I hate to add to my pile of Stuff here, an all-in-one printer is essential to prevent the stockpile of paper records from taking over my life again.

I started my reduction-of-paper quest some time ago, but there weren't any good deals to be had at the time so a friend offered up her printer/scanner. I loved it, btw, but it's more than time to get one of my own so I don't have to keep bothering her as the inevitable paper mail trickles in.

Perusing the Staples ads, and Fatwallet of course, HP had some pretty good offers but a friend warned me off: his HP AIO, and a number of others according to the help forums, have problems with retaining wireless connectivity. Or working.

I liked the looks of a couple of the Lexmark and Brother models in terms of technical specs, not so much for aesthetic reasons, but the deals were lackluster.

My requirements are not many:
Flatbed scanner with an Auto Document Feeder
Wireless capability
Double sided printing (manual is fine)
Separate ink cartridges preferable
Less than $100
Lightweight: less than 18 lbs?

So far, the only AIO that looks remotely like matching the wish list is the Epson Workforce 310
available from Frys.com or Staples.com for $89.99 after coupon. Black ink carts run about $18, and color packs are $37 for all three colors (CMY), or about $13 per color.

I'd also heard good things about the Brother brand, and this Brother MFC-490CW model doesn't look half bad, either. The printer is the same price, but the ink carts are a bit pricier. The auto feed capacity is only half that of the Epson at 15 pages, but that shouldn't be a dealbreaker since the scanning pile is relatively controlled.

And what is this "cable NOT included business," anyway?

Thoughts?

Go on over and check out the latest edition of the Carnival of Personal Finance at Budgets are Sexy.

Personal Note: A dear friend's spouse is in the hospital in critical condition. Thoughts, prayers and good vibes are welcome.

• I have comfortable shoes to wear when trying to run/jog/walk/gasp my frustration and claustrophobia off, so my feet don't hurt. Just the rest of me.
• Vinegar seemed to make my laundry a bit brighter?
• Oiling the locks DID make my key work without the usual wrist-grinding, finger-jamming frustration and yelling at the door. And the occasional kick. Awesome.
• I am super out of shape.
• Fascinated by the Etsy shop full of pocket watches found by Cents in the City
• Considering internship + education route, something I've wanted for a long time but is now the right time? Can't sit still for much longer, but it won't be the massive change I crave.
  

Intervention: A gathering of longtime friends and their spouses turned into a dogpile of "you need to go to the doctor!" Our "target" was a lovely new mother who seemed to think that seeing objects plus an extra aura-like outline was negligible, and her increasingly painful joints just part of new, busy, motherhood. I didn't hesitate for a second to whip out the guilt trip: "my mother refused to take care of herself for months, years, decades even. And look at the results of that decision! Think of your daughter!" She agreed to start scheduling appointments this week.

Promos: I've earned both my Electric Orange promotion, having finally reached the $250 spending requirement on the Citibank offer. I'm still waiting on my referral money from opening my TradeKing account.

Electric Orange and checks: While I still have a box of checks, I thought I'd try out the Electric Orange Mail a Check service. They foot the bill for the postage, but it looks like you have to transfer the money to ING at least seven days before the check is due. Remember to account for non-business days! A check cannot be dated for a non-business mailing date.

If it needs to be there on the 15th, the money transfer needs to be iniated on the 6th, the money will be available on either the 7th or 10th, and then it takes 5 business days to arrive via first class mail.

Food: Clementines are back on sale for $5/3 pound box. Not the best deal ever, but affordable, so huzzah! Y'all know how I feel about my Vit C. Also scored great deals on fresh whole chicken (it's cheaper to butcher on your own, and by on "your own" I mean have my dad do it), yummy pears, pasta, and bell peppers. They sort of make a meal, together, too.

Kitchen: Tinkering with recipes is fun, but I'm a bit of a kitchen hog. If you're not there to play sous chef/food taster, I don't want you in the kitchen "helping" me. It's annoying. Go cook somewhere else, this was my idea!

A few links: Madame X's long-awaited summer vacation (post) sounds a-ma-zing!
Frugal Trenches has a great series on Getting Rid of Your Sense of Entitlement.
MoneyDummy made me smile as she discovers that laying in a large supply of an addict's habit = higher consumption.

FB's post on keeping up with her credit card transactions explains a very similar technique I used when my family was still involved in my finances.

They had credit card debt, half of which had been balance-transferred to my name, they had regular rent/utilities bills which weren't always covered by their income, they had loans from me, the list ran on for some length.

My finances became this huge non-linear web: income (mine) - outflow (mine) - income (parents) - outflow (theirs) + income (mine) to cover their outflow - outflow (brother's) + income (mine) to cover his inadequate or non-existent income.

To make things even more complicated, there were debts I'd forgiven, there were new debts accumulated, there was irregular income, irregular overtime, and periods of non-payment. The budgeting calendar was a hot mess!

Eventually, the best way to coordinate things during the time before business credit cards (to divide and track our purchases by user) was to tally each deposit and outgoing check by highlighter and separate transactions.

Every single payment from the family was labeled by name (Dad), amount ($50), reason (loan), and type (cash). While the check ledger was never reconciled in the traditional sense, each outgoing cash loan was recorded, and later struck through once a payment was recorded and
color-coded.

Nowadays, payments are only bundled when I'm scheduling them for bills to be paid out within the same week, preferably in the same day.


As long as a quick glance shows that each transaction is accounted for, I don't have to worry about running short on funds, overdrawing, or any such thing. Saves me time and fuss, it's my form of automation.

Ms. Ginger touched on this yesterday in her combo confessional and fix-it post. She and I must be channeling each other this week. ;)

Aside from the spending reports from my recent travel, let's just say I've ... been paying so little attention to my cash flow that I have no idea how much I've spent this month. But that's not the worst part - I've been going out sporadically, but no more than once or twice a week, and for pretty low-key stuff. Local burger joint, and suchlike.

No, my real stupidity is located in the travel reservation part of life. During my most hectic lead-up to two weekends ago, I made reservations at a Best Western for a single night stay in the middle of nowhere because that's where an old friend was getting married. After days of squeezing in hotel and rental car research between other obligations, my travel companion and I came to the realization we just couldn't afford it.

Cue: cancel the hotel reservation. Right? RIGHT???

Oh no. THIS idiot forgot about it completely.

Seriously. 100% completely forgot it until a note of the $98 transaction popped up on Yodlee charged to my trusty new credit card. When the truth dawned on me, I was as wordless as a much less cheerful Andy Runton's Owly .....


"????" I said.

Then "!!!!!"

You may not think it's physically possible to kick oneself and hang head in shame at the same time, but it is. Oh, it is. ("!!!!!")

Now I'd better creatively replace that money. ("......")

This is what happens when you stray from routine: mistakes that cost you big money. Normally everything that has a cancellation date is recorded meticulously on the day of the call, as well as on the day that I have to make the cancellation call by. My planner, however, has been languishing on my desk since July 1st, and that's all my fault.

Evidently, according to reader K of Frugal Zeitgeist, only those unemployment claims filed before June 15th are eligible for the massively extended benefits.

Since K is in NYC, I figured I'd better check out the CA site to make sure I know what's what. According to the informational PDF, Miss M is right that the claims balance is the amount I can claim before running out of money:

The maximum amount of a regular UI claim is either 26 times the claimant's weekly benefi t amount or one-half of the claimant's base period wages, whichever is less.

Both the Federal government and California have their own extended benefits programs that will kick in:

only when unemployment is very high. This program pays additional benefits to those who qualify and have collected all of the benefits on their regular claims and
who are not eligible for any other UI claims. The EDD will notify individuals by mail and/or through the media when they become potentially eligible for these benefits.

Under Fed-ED, claimants who have exhausted their regular UI claim may be eligible to collect up to 13 additional weeks of compensation if a Fed-ED period is in effect. Once activated, the Fed-ED period must continue in effect for at least 13 weeks. When the program is deactivated, it must remain inactive for at least 13 weeks.

And then for California:

California has its own state-financed extended benefits program. The benefits paid under this program are from the state UI fund. The trigger mechanism for the Cal-ED program is similar to Fed-ED. Under either Cal-ED or Fed-ED, an individual receives up to one-half of the regular UI base claim. Therefore, any claimant who has
received the full amount of extended benefits on a Fed-ED claim cannot qualify for a Cal-ED claim based on the same base claim.

Obviously I don't PLAN to remain unemployed for so long that I need to use the extended benefits programs, but it's best to be informed.

On the matter of delaying my COBRA coverage: I knew there was a reason I kept all the paperwork!

It turns out that I was just delaying the inevitable. According to page 7 of my rather fat stack of papers here, I am NOT (and I assume that includes you, Funny) exempt from making the retroactive payments on these intervening months since leaving my former place of employ.

As they say ...

This initial payment premium is for the retroactive coverage period from the date of loss of coverage to the date you elect continuation coverage.

That's disappointing.

Even though my authorial participation in carnivals is low, I haven't found my stories yet, at least, not the stories that fit into each specific carnival, I still want to remain engaged with the pf blogging community at large.

I've found a job for myself that is more in line with my behind-the-scenes style: helping Flexo manage the Carnival of Personal Finance!

I'm excited about this opportunity, and hope that I'll be a good fit on the other side of the curtains!

The Carnival is now live at Kelly's Almost Frugal!

We've got some crazy myths debunked by Micheal Rubin in 12 Crazy Myths of Personal Finance, Kyle from Amateur Asset Allocation warns us Never Ever Invest Through A Bank, Adam suggests that we Stop Lying, 5 Ways to Stop Overspending, and Darwin from Darwin’s Finance offers ways for us to be better with our time in Are you Efficient? Save Time by Applying Lean Thinking to Everyday Life.

Enjoy!

Fast on the heels of my declaration of independence from one kind of family tie, I face another.

What does one do, when simply listening to the cadence of another's speech, the emotion, knowing that the little tears in the corners of the eye, the breaking voice, were all just cues built in meant specifically for manipulation [to my ears], drives you into a hands-shaking rage?

No, that's not healthy. But that IS family.

I'll be honest. I've been avoiding my brother via the cold shoulder and various other defensive-shunting techniques for the past few months because every time I even consider having a sit-down with him, I get angry. It took two months to pen a response to his most recent outrageously audacious "I'm trying ever so hard, and btw, can I get a little more free rein around here if I help out some more?" missive. Are you kidding me? Because I'm pretty sure that was followed up by a distinct period of doing less. I never sent it because I wanted to be sure this was a battle worth engaging in.

Frankly, I just didn't want to hear it. Not the excuses, not the whining, not the plaints that he's trying soooo hard. None of it. Don't care. Haven't seen it, and don't care. Patience hath boiled over and boiled off in this little pot, and the last thing we needed was steam in this already sweltering heat. Yet, how long can you ignore a family member who lives feet away from you? [At last count ... three and a half months. We're restarting the clock.]

Seriously, though. He actually came and apologized for being too loud, which he was, but really, it was an apology because he'd gotten caught. And for what? For the dumbest thing -- I wasn't out to catch him! I'd just remembered to take out the trash! [Serious. Check my Twitter. I'd just gone out to get the trash and ran into him outside.]

Jeepers. If I didn't know better, I'd swear I was living in a trailer park, about to get shipped out to Jerry Springer.

So now I feel obligated to give the real verbal thrashing for the real issues I'm angry about - of which there are many, and of those many, all are justified - since I had to listen to his idiotic sob stories despite doing my darndest to avoid them and the angry rant I've got to deliver. It's only fair. If he'd just left me alone, I wouldn't have to play the parent role again. Jerk. *scowl*

[Stacking Pennies, Paranoid Asteroid, Sallie's Niece, who else am I forgetting?]

I've sown the first (second, truthfully) seed.

No, not that one. The other one. The one where I tell one member of my family, a beloved cousin, that I'm just not on for that wedding + extended family + people I Don't Even Know nonsense. Present company excepted, I'm just not into the wedding hullaballoo and not to be surprised if I elope.

She didn't give me the You'd Better Tell Me! ultimatum like my other cousin did. Which is good. That means she's not taking it too seriously, but now she knows the possibility is out there.

*rubbing hands in anticipation*

I feel like a total rebel. There's been one non-traditional wedding in the family in the last 25 years, and that was only acceptable because the two in question were two older adults who weren't expected to be their parents' showcases. [Because their parents were deceased.]

It wasn't until this past year that I realized that all my stressing about saving at least $25,000 for a wedding that I wasn't going to enjoy just because I wanted to honor my family's expectations was just crap.

1 - I hate being the center of attention. My poor mom kept trying to talk sense into me: you only get this chance once, it's your only special day, everybody will want to see you.... but she never realize that last point was always the endgame. I like my friends, I like some of my family. I love spending time with them. But I hate being in the spotlight! It makes me feel like a spastic, awkwardly grinning monkey.

2 - I really hate being in the spotlight. Hate hate hate. I've served as bridesmaid often enough to be happy I'm just in the sidelines of the spotlight, but I grinned and bore it for the love of my friends who were reveling in their special day.

3 - I like the work involved in putting a wedding together, I've done enough of them to know the drill, the dance and the panic polka, and it's kind of fun, really, but that's more because I'm a workaholic. Thus, I like the work. And it's fun creating a bride's vision. But I just don't really have a vision of my own. I've never looked at the weddings I've attended, been in, or worked on and said, "laaaa-siiiighhhh, I want mine to be juuuust like thaaaat." Given the chance, I might be able to pick a dress. But that's about it.

So this is my thought. If I get married, I'm really pushing hard for an elopement, or a civil ceremony and a small friends + family party. I just don't feel the imperative to prove it to the world in the form of perfectly arranged flowers, too much fluffy tulle, and organizational gymnastics. The world doesn't know me, or particularly care.

Besides, marriage isn't about that. It's about the relationship, which is best homespun and supplied with plenty of food and laughter. So I'm not betraying anything, I'm just taking it down a notch to simplicity.

P.S. Ladies currently planning or intending to plan your weddings? Please continue! I love attending a lovely wedding. I like wedding pictures, even watching the wedding video afterwards, if it's good. I just doubt I can handle being the bride myself. :)

Even if ING hasn't been the highest savings rate leader it once was, I still keep some money with them. Paltry though the interest rates are, that's pretty much the case across the board at all of my banks. Since I've been going minimalist, one step at a time, I've refrained from opening more accounts at new banks in the name of rate chasing. If any bank offers the whole package, and allows me to access my own accounts using an aggregator, though, I'm switching! [Watch yourself, ING!]

In the meantime, their interface remains easy to navigate, and the bright orange motif attractive. No, the latter means nothing to me as a customer, it's just true.

Their Electric Orange checking account has been at least a little intriguing because I'm going to run out of paper checks soon, and it'd be nice to have an alternative to buying another 300 checks to last a lifetime.

1. A set of ninja hooks for my super-classy future foyer. When I have a place of my own .... Y'all know my decorating theme will be whatever Makes Me Laugh, right? [And this is why in more lucid moments, I ask anyone with an ounce of sense and taste to take care of my interior design.]

2. A full size mouse. Not the squeak-squeak with whiskers kind, though I don't mind them, I want .. I NEED a full size mouse for my computer. Rheumy fingers don't like this micro-POS that I got from an ex-boyfriend in college for my first computer to hold me over until I found a real one. It's been nine years. I deserve a grown up mouse. And with 4 USB ports, I don't have to splurge on wireless if I don't have the money.

3. A trust fund.

What??? Don't give me that dirty look. I'll buy you all ice cream if you stop looking at me like that. You can't imagine the good I can do in the world with a trust fund. Think of the animals! Oh, you didn't know? My childhood dream was to get rich enough so that I could own a ranch and collect all the old unwanted animals where they had enough food and room to roam. I'm pretty sure someone else was going to get paid to pick up the mess, though. I only do grooming.

3a. For those of you still judging me, I'll take a final decision on an interview bag as a close, but poor, second third option. I think we're closer, but it's still going to cost $30, probably. It looks a lot better than the first option. I did return the first and second bags I took for a trial spin.

4. To give the best birthday and Christmas presents ever, always. It's really hard, and I'm already worried about Christmas.

5. A cozy little home of my own, with all the stuff I need in it. Financed by a lovely JOB of my own.

**Other Wish Listers (this all started from Stacking Pennies)
Fabulously Broke
Little Miss Moneybags
Stacking Pennies

I'm only sort of tongue in cheek about most of this list. I really do want that mouse though. My fingers are cramped already, I don't need help. My biggest real wish is to be done and DONE with this stupid disease business because it is getting in my way. I hate losing whole days to pain and fatigue, it's such a WASTE.

Possibly the most popular question of the year: What would you do if you lost your job?

Well, young grasshopper, I'm totally there.

Most PF savvy folks immediately address cost-cutting measures, identifying and trimming the fat from their budgets. This is always a good idea: you need to batten down the hatches since you don't know how long you'll be taking on water before you find another job.

I'd already been on the cost-cutting rampage for months so discovering that a layoff was imminent was even more motivation to bring monthly expenses down to a bare minimum. By the time the layoff and I were staring at each other, inches apart, nose to nose, I'd achieved near parity. My household's monthly needs, outside of my personal spending, were officially within $200 of my unemployment benefits.

The cash cushion I'd amassed during that time, courtesy of those very same cost-cutting measures (eliminating extra vehicles, reducing auto insurance, reducing gas and electricity usage, etc.,) and working mucho overtime meant that I had the luxury of not panicking once the paychecks stopped. I was sure that I would, but I didn't have to.

Applying for unemployment. There was a tang of bitterness when I sat down to fill out the claim form. I thought I'd have found another job by this time - didn't I establish my rep as a resourceful, high-producing, motivated careerist? Yes, but that's a gripe for another day. Today my job is to make sure that some form of income continues to flow in to cover the bills while I stump for jobs. The one benefit of ending employment mid-week was that even though I was paid for a few days of work the last week of June, the entire week of 6/28-7/4 was designated the mandated waiting week. That only cost half a week of waiting for benefits.

Constantly on the move. Since long before the layoff paperwork was in motion, I've been working on my resume, talking to people, networking, applying for jobs, and interviewing. I've got at least three active applications in undecided status right now, but I'm not resting on my laurels. The resume is being revamped again post-feedback from another professional and I'm sending the new one out ASAP to my current contacts. In the meantime, though I'm awaiting a decision on the Dream Job, I'm exploring other options in other fields. The second I know that these prospects aren't panning out? I'm on the next train out to another career.

R&R: The last 5 days were eaten up by friends/family obligations, so I didn't have time to do more than make sure paperwork was in the mail in time, and gather information for my next moves. Still, I've got to build in some time to rest because I can't be on the run constantly. I'll physically rest at least one day a week, but my brain will finally begin to process the list of opportunities.

My first unemployment check arrived in the mail. There's no sense of excitement or satisfaction like that of paydays. Maybe it's because there aren't the corresponding retirement contributions, or the transfers to savings that are normal with direct deposited checks. Or maybe it's because "earning" unemployment is exhausting to the soul. Whatever the case, I'm depositing it know that it's part of what keeps the wolves at bay and continuing with my job search.

Note to self: the stub attached to the check had the following note: "Your claim balance after this payment is $11,250." I'm not certain what that means. Must find out.

Free Wi-Fi at Barnes and Noble - Use the storefinder to see if you've got a free access store near you. Thanks to Jonathan of My Money Blog and Lifehacker.

2 Free Hours of Wi-Fi at Starbucks - Also from Jonathan. When you have a registered gift card and use it once a month, you can get 2 hours of free wi-fi.

Tradeking celebrates National Friendship Day - Between August 1 and August 27, a referral nets both parties $50 each after a $1000 deposit and trade has been executed. Email me [revanche.gs - @- gmail.com] if you would like a referral!

200 Bonus minutes and text messages for AT&T FAN customers - If you have a FAN [Foundation Account Number] account, you can try calling in to add feature codes for freebies. My CSR had some trouble figuring out how to add them, and it took her a while to access the codes, but she was able to add 200 free bonus minutes [U200] and 200 free bonus text messages [CLL2]. Found on Fatwallet.

I'm pretty psyched about that last one, I've been very frustrated with the limited number of minutes and texts on my plan for a long time. Using the phone conservatively worked when I was employed but it's been particularly hard during the job hunt with interviews and such.

In the run-up to this year's Con, Friend and I discussed our plans and our buy list, and struggled with naming titles that we were interested in continuing.

For him, he'd been buying more than he should have to fill the void created by working in a soulless environment. I just didn't have the heart to want anything but out. Two very different approaches to the same problem.

We agreed that, despite the usual ritual of purchasing the next year's gifts at Con, we'd focus more on the experience than acquisition. Makes sense, we nodded, we've got more time than money this year. That decided, we resumed sharing job-hunting frustrations: interviewing, and sending out new applications - time consuming, depressing hurry-up-and-wait scenarios.

Two days before Con, we got fantastic news: he'd landed a job and would be, for him, raking it in! Within half an hour, I'd outlined his future budget: 25% of gross to taxes, 25% of gross to savings, 35% of gross to expenses, 15% remaining to play with. [For the record, he wasn't pleased with my planning. And Christmas presents, I prognosticate, will be ridiculous this year. They will be outrageous. They might even be obscenely outrageous. That's how his mind works. Also, for the record, it took 30 minutes because we needed 25 minutes to celebrate before I got back on track.]

In the aftermath accounting, a ton of time was spent spending money, sending that mantra right out the window, but the real surprise is that a paradigm shift occurred when I wasn't looking: I don't have more time than money. I can't make more time, I can't bank more time and I certainly can't earn more time credits by working overtime. Yes, that sort of fell apart at the end, there. The point is: wasting time is like that awful commercial about the dude eating the Skittles from his friend's hourglass. You cannot pay back your time debt, this is all you get!

And that brings to mind a line from Planetary (by Warren Ellis, Vol 1): "Tell her it doesn't get any better than this. After this, there's nothing. Do you see? .... This time is all we have; we can't allow anyone to take it from us." I'm not advocating vigilante justice or anti-religious crusades, the point is simply that this life is what we get. We should value and enjoy it accordingly.

My concern about not making money hasn't gone away. I have major life and financial goals that can only be reached by earning, but for the first time, it's matched by my concern that I'll go back to business as usual and fail to maximize this rare time off.

This is new. Work has been the fact of life since age nine: my parents owned a business and I was expected to go there after school and weekends if I wanted to see them. Pitch in if I wanted them to go home at any reasonable hour. Earning my own wages, since money from my parents was family money, was a big deal. At 16, I took a job with the Census and I've been working ever since. Bulling ahead was my primary focus, and for far too long, life was something that happened after hours if it fit in. Workaholism was not a bad word in my lexicon. But as sage Crystal recently said, "There is more to your short life than being employed just for the sake of being employed."

And appropriately for my situation of searching for the right next step, comic book writer Joshua Dysart agrees, "You can live your life the way you want to and be creative. And you can deny the cubicle your soul."