Retirement Savings	Roth IRA: $4,212 401(a): $5,399 403(b): $12,751 Total: $ 22,362 (20,415)
Emergency Savings	Catastrophe: $ 28,721 Problem Cushion: $ 1,000 Total: $ 29,721 (24,816)
Short Term Goals	Car Maintenance: $1067 Insurance: $2,178 Travel/Con: $401 Taxes: $3,522 Moving: $1,465 Total: $ 8,633 (7,278)
Long Term Goals	House Down Payment: $101
Investment Loans	Prosper-ish: $12,630 Personal Loan: $3,000 Savings Bond: $362 (current accrued value) Total: $ 15,992 (16,992)
Total Assets	Illiquid: $ 22,362 Semi-Liquid: $15,992 Liquid: $29,721 Expense Acct: $10,133 Goals Savings: $8,633 Total: $ 86,841 (78,640)
Debt and Liabilities	Citi 2: $255 Chase: $171 Rent: $1,360 Total: $1,786 (1,807)
Net Worth	$ 85,055 (76,833)

One might wonder from the wildly inflated numbers above, based on my less than abundant salary, if I am some sort of saving genius. Savant, even. They would be incorrect. I'm simply a modest saver hugely motivated by the soon-to-end income stream. More transparently, the rest of my salary from the past quarter came in yesterday, and was quickly deposited into the insurance, maintenance, expenses and savings funds. In the pursuit of obtaining life insurance, the car insurance fund is simply meant for all insurances, now.

So, the plan is to have as much cash on hand as possible. That's meant seriously paring any and all expenses down to bone, to the marrow even, in the budget. That might be a little too extreme, some of the monies in savings might have to migrate to the expenses fund.

Plus, I made some stupid mistakes like forgetting to pay my DMV registration. After six years of car ownership, paying for three car registrations, this year I managed to forget my own registration and ate a $91 late fee. Ugh. Pray for me. Even better: the registration is always due on Valentine's Day! I managed to forget a major commercial holiday and it cost me nearly a hundred dollars. The only side effect of recent health issues is that I'm too drained to get as worked up about it as I normally might.

Speaking of stupid fees, this time in the sense that I think the fees are stupid rather than paying a fee because I'm stupid as above, Chase was gifted with a solid $100 for the privilege of giving me back my money. Thusly the Rollover IRA has disappeared, rolling further over into the 403(b). At least it was a relatively simple process.

At a time when hoarding and squirreling away money is Priority Numero Uno, I'm sure wasting a lot of it on fees. *annoyed with self* There are way better things I could have spent that money on.

This guy just barrels into the house, sniffs all around, and settles down at my feet as though he's belongs there and I wouldn't notice a thing. Note the studiously wrinkled brow as he ignores me:



Can't really complain, actually, as he's now taken up guard at the front door after some strange dudes were banging at the door. Good dog.

There are a billion and one articles in the pf blogosphere on saving (or not) money when planning a wedding. That's not what this is about. I've linked to a few of the more recent conversations, some controversial, some not, about weddings below if you want the juicier stuff.

I've put weddings out of my mind for the foreseeable future, but my family has a few cultural traditions that amuse me. I'm opting out of most, but they're still fun to editorialize on.

1. Invitations: Seeing invitations on the kitchen table is what prompted this post. In all the ways money is saved or spent in wedding planning, the bride and groom can count on the clumping of families to save on mailing costs. They pick one person who can be relied on in each branch of the family, and send all the invitations in bulk to that one person. Cost of sending ten invitations to my family for distribution: $1.85. I'm betting there aren't even RSVPs in there because they depend on the family grapevine to deliver that news since people are terrible about RSVPing. (This would drive the plannerly side of me insane.)

2. Wedding gifts: We're Asian. We give cold hard cash, enough to "cover" the plate just means about $50/person, now. My family does not impose this expectation on guests from other cultures, so you can invite your bosses, coworkers or other ethnically inclined friends without having to shun them afterward for improper gift giving. (There's never a registry though, so that doesn't make it easier on the non-family guests.) Anyway, as my parents explained it, there are two parts to the traditional wedding, and the money involved.

3. The morning ceremony: This is the "religious" part of the wedding, generally only family and very close friends are invited to this session. Most of my family is Buddhist or just observe Confucianism, so it involves the groom's family bringing the representative symbols of the bride's dowry in the form of a roast pig, fresh fruit, and bottles of wine or liquor. Also, jewelry for the bride. I know it's awful, but it's one way to see how much the groom's family likes the bride. If they break out awesome sparkles, they love you lots. If the necklace and earrings are lackluster, watch out, your in-laws are not cool with the marriage (or you). Good time to find out, eh?

At the tea ceremony, the red envelopes stuffed with cash are presented to the bride and groom as the new couple share a cup of tea with the guest. A rule of thumb: the older the guest, the closer the relationship, the more money you're expected to fork out. My parents had to give her siblings upwards of $500-$700 each, back in the day, in addition to paying for parts of the wedding. Then again, we don't keep track of who gave what (I don't think we do). It's all put into a bag or basket anyway, so if the guest wants to remain anonymous, that's fine.

Traditionally, the bride's family hosts this part of the day, and serves lunch to all the guests. The bride's parents get to keep all that money from the morning ceremony. It's "repayment" for all the weddings they attended in the community. I always wondered what the groom's parents got their share. If everyone followed these rules, they seem to get gypped.

4. The evening portion is the reception. Guest lists can easily surpass 400-500 people if you're so inclined, and with an extended family like mine, we could fill that many seats on my side alone. Again, the gift expectation is cash, but the bride and groom get to keep that money. It usually goes towards covering the cost of the wedding, reception, etc. Some people, in Eastern European countries or Asian countries, actually plan to make money off their wedding. It's part of their accepted cultural practice, and it's all very interesting to see that kind of planning. One girlfriend used to call me and tell me in hushed tones what her brother in law was doing this time to minimize expenses and maximize profits from his upcoming wedding. I can't count the number of times I've heard my uncle dismiss my wish for a small wedding to reduce costs, "Pf, why make it small? To save money? Don't worry! Invite everyone you want, the gifts will help pay for the wedding."

Well, no. *shrug* I hate being the center of attention, and my guests are not cash cows so the whole thing is not my bag, but I know they think I'm being silly. Shhh, they don't know that if I'm getting married, I'm doing it my way!

5. Thank yous: If you're going totally traditional, you don't send thank you cards. Most weddings will have photographers taking your photo with the couple at the reception's receiving line, and some will print those out for you to take home. Just like Medieval Times.

Makes sense, if everyone gave you cash. What would you say? "Dear Auntie, thank you for the lovely $200, we'll display it on the mantle"? "It'll be a great part of our down payment"? I'm kidding, of course you could write a lovely thank you note for their attendance. Really, the potential anonymity of the gift-giving plays into this part of the tradition, as well as the usually outsized guest lists that can frequently include more than 100 guests you've never met or haven't seen since you were three. It happens.

Oh, and the photos have a "thank you for attending" printed on them. Sooo ... free pass! :)
Obviously, all of these little traditions and accepted practices are specific to our family. The reason they "work" is because most weddings are still considered formal affairs that include negotiations, love match or not. Weird? Yeah. Definitely. But it does makes sense to discuss all the expectations when there's obviously so much emotion, time and money invested. From my parents' generation, I've even witnessed the debates over acceptable negotiators! My dad was frequently requested as a go-between for the bride or groom, to speak on their behalf to the other side's parents and work out the details of how the wedding would be handled, so I heard more about the nuances than most kids.

Still, I'd like to make my own path because after being involved in so many traditions, it feels like a bit of an ordeal. I want to be able to sit and talk with my family and friends, and know that the people attending actually cared. Bratly it may be, I've paid my family dues so I'd like to have a bit of fun for my wedding.

Paranoid Asteroid: 10 frugal things I'm not doing for my wedding
When people ask how you can spend $30K on a wedding…
FruGal: Fresh off the plane, and newly wed!
DogAteMyFinances: Lost of stuff here on Cheap Gifts, Bridesmaid Dresses, a wedding budget.
Living Almost Large: Her take on the gifts thing.
Ramit Sethi: Practicality! A man after my own heart with The $28,000 question: Why are we all hypocrites about weddings?

My dad sure has good timing. Whatever he's feeling guilty about, yesterday was definitely the best day to eat my cooking in an attempt to soothe my supposedly troubled soul. In my life, he's never offered to eat anything I've made from scratch. It's usually a good instinct, even though he claims it's only because he prefers Asian foods, since my stovetop experimentation rarely produces a home run. But, last night's? Was magic.

Presenting: the green bean, asparagus macaroni and cheese casserole!


In true old-Asian-woman style, I didn't measure but by hand and feel. I will guarantee that's at least a pound of shredded cheddar, one whole egg, and a can of green beans (found one, score!), but cannot attest to the quantities of any other ingredients. Handfuls, what looked about right, more handfuls, and so it went.

It may not look like much, but I assure you: delicious! It's got a perfectly crunchy cheese and cracker crust, with gooey cheddar underneath holding the penne pasta, asparagus and green beans together. The best part is that the cheese forms a distinct layer on top, and is lightly distributed through the rest of the strata so it's not overwhelmingly cheesy. One pound of cheddar notwithstanding.

Or wait, is the best part that it cost me less than $5 to make an entire pan of it?

No, no, no, don't be silly. Cheese is the best part. Cheese is like unto manna for my taste buds. :)

Every single time canned vegetables are on sale for less than fifty cents a can, I buy sweet corn and green beans. Usually French cut style, but sometimes regular cut when the French is out of stock. This is a compulsion of unknown origin and rationale: I never actually open those cans and do anything with them.

For the first time in years, I decided to make something with green beans. Mac and cheese, specifically. I was contemplating a casserole, or just green beans on the side. There's nary a can to be found, though. None! My family doesn't eat the canned green beans, they're never on the dinner table, and I just keep buying them. So .... what happened to all those cans??

And then there's that little white dog running around our front yard. A cute little brown-tip eared white Chihuahua that looks just like my dearly departed Chihuahua with reversed colors who ran right up to me and stood up on my knee, wagging his tail for all it's worth. Strange day.

I'm steaming over the loss of the entire post that should have gone up yesterday, but didn't. Instead, I tried to post it from my phone's web browser, had to edit the title, and somehow lost the entire post!

Oh well. Y'all probably didn't need the long version anyway. Here's the summary:

Professional
1. Attended another (wait listed) class for my Certificate program this week. Would have missed this opportunity if I hadn't called and asked for it; you're supposed to sit and wait for them to contact you when there are openings but I couldn't afford to be passive. (Never mind I was late thanks to the take-many-detours shuttle driver. Have I ever mentioned how much I HATE being late?)
2. Requested permission to "crash" another course two weeks ago. We're down to the wire here, so I absolutely have to hit every class if I want to take my Certificates of Supervision and Management before the layoff. This means my assertiveness is getting a major workout.

Financial
1. +40: check received from the Airborne class action settlement.
2. +10: my first payout from MySurvey.com
3. +226: this is really a refund, not a plus sign. My dad peeved me because he had over 30 days to return the Dish Network equipment but didn't so they charged my card. Now I have to wait for them to acknowledge and process receipt of the equipment, process a manual return, and then request a manual refund from the credit card. Bleh.
4. +153: Still waiting for the credit card to send a check from the second insurance refund. Meh.

Fun/Consumerism
1. LOVED MoneyFunk's latest project: a turtle Amigurumi! I'm a total sucker for cute turtles.
2. Have plans for a $22 prix fixe dinner with a friend next week; a treat is usually a $4 cheeseburger or a couple of chicken soft tacos, but occasionally I have a hankerin'. And it's at a restaurant I can't ever afford, normally.

I loved MoneyDummy's crochet project where she magicked old sheets into bathroom rugs. Make that projects, plural. It's not just because it's so creative, but also because it transforms something formerly grubby or less than desirable in its original form and gives it new life.

I was about to try to be that ambitious, but realized I probably should wait until I have new sheets to replace the old ones before I had three new bathrugs and zero sheets. Pff, practicality!

Instead, as part of the great closet clean-out that's dragged on for weeks, months (!) I was giving up old tops that just had a bit of sentimental value or I just couldn't Goodwill or discard entirely. And the great thing about fussing and cleaning on the telephone with your BFF, other than the moral support and feeling like it was good ole high school days again, is that she often comes up with great ideas. Can't toss old shirts? Take 'em to her ma!

Why?

Because her ma is a flippin' crafty genius, and turned it into this handsome devil of a quilt:

That corner's folded down to show you the lovely no-pill fleece backing. The blue-purple squares that are kind of shiny is a suede (washable!) sort of material, and that almost Hawaiian purple print used to be my scrubs from my animal hospital days. Unfortunately, the flash doesn't do justice to the redder floral bits.

Isn't that cool? Someday, I will learn to do this for myself. Someday!

Can it make Mondays better? Here are a few fondly remembered meals of my once-extravagant business-dinner past:

Oh, formal business dinners, how I miss thee ....

Apologies but I can't identify all the meals by name/restaurant, it feels like that would be revealing too much. (For example, how poor my memory is, for one thing!)

And I know we had some spectacular salads, too, but I can't find those pictures, so wee cute little dessert will have to suffice.

And I can assure you, all those fancy dinners did not make me a food snob. While they were delightfully, sinfully delicious, I truly appreciate my plain food routine after all the rich foods and eating out.

It's funny how an increment of $10k can evolve a game plan. Now that we're past anticipation of and well into preparation for the layoff, I've been dabbling with numbers and colors on Google Docs spreadsheets. I need to know we'll be "ok" if this trend of employers passively rejecting me, ie: not calling me back, continues.

Multiple scenario budgets have been projected based on remaining unemployed through December 2009. Barring emergencies, they reveal that:

A) We will be ok until the end of this year.
B) Assuming unemployment will supplement savings, we'll survive beyond the end of this year.
C) I can afford to take at least one major trip (<$2000). For sanity's sake, I can't afford not to take that trip.

These revelations are fairly reassuring, at least until the New Year, at which point full scale, high grade panic will commence if I don't have a job nailed down. It doesn't matter if I still have $30k in cash. Without cash flow, I will be freaking out. Consider yourselves warned.

These three iterations made the most sense for modeling purposes.

Scenario 1: With full expenses, no major travel, unsubsidized Cobra

Scenario 2: With full expenses, two major trips, and unsubsidized Cobra

Scenario 3: With full expenses, two major trips, and subsidized Cobra


Notes
A) Both vacation and severance payouts are estimates, to be paid at the beginning of July.
B) "Travel" money every month is just an allowance. It's not much, but you better believe I'm not just sitting on my butt at home all day every day.

Some thoughts. If anything goes wonky with severance and vacation, knock $5000 off that starting savings total. That's a just-in-case. We'll likely know by mid-June if they intend to be obstreperous.

I'd like to contribute $5000 to my 2008 and 2009 Roth IRAs, so subtract $10,000 total from the savings balance. But if I end this year with no new job lined up, that leaves between $23,000- 28,000 to start the new year.

Um. No. Voluntarily dipping below $25,000 cash savings is an no fly zone. Going below that number makes me fear for the still-nascent house fund, among other things. $30,000 would be much better. $40,000, even better. But you can see where this might lead: no trips, no rest, no travel, no life, no balance. While I'm fiscally conservative, timidity in financial planning is not my thing.

Speaking of fear, everyone's fearful now so, according to Buffett, it's time to be greedy. Not too greedy, but I do want to set aside some non-retirement investing money while the market is still trashed. Buy low, yes? A thousand bucks'll be plenty because that low, low price might very well turn into zero.

After some consideration, I think this is the plan:
1) don't allow anything to go awry with severance and vacation. Don't mess with my money, boss!
2) don't contribute to my 2009 Roth.
3) do contribute to 2008 Roth. ($-5000)
4) consolidate emergency cash into a single account, probably a money market given the state of my existing "high" yield savings accounts.
5) continue job hunting
6) plan an awesome trip that includes educational facets that I can add to my resume
7) find a few CDs and create a CD ladder for some of that money
8) research stocks, see if I can muster the confidence to commit to a few

If 2010 dawns with new job secured, I can contribute to my 2009 Roth, salt away something for the emergency fund while replenishing the expense cushion, and start seriously funding the house account. Ideally, that new job would require a move of reasonable distance and affordability.

Lists and spreadsheets laying out possible outcomes in a situation largely out of my control helps me focus my attention where it'll do the most good. Then I can look at this job loss dead in the eye and call it opportunity.

It's an emotional and physical off-roading sort of week, so I've been uninspired. That was going to be the thrust of the post, but complaining's not going to help. (Or hasn't, yet.)

Thusly, we're going to practice optimism, today, because:

1) it's Wednesday!
2) I found a highly challenging job listing that I'm a little underqualified for but I don't care, I want it anyway. And I could do it, if they would overlook the lack of a Master's degree. Promise.
3) and Sallie's Niece got the job!
4) so that means it's not categorically impossible. [No, that's not logical. Doesn't matter.]

I've been a bit fed up with my doom and gloom. Luckily, I got it all out over at i pick up pennies (thanks Abby!) Not that I suggest you read my rant, please don't, just visit Abby if you like.

And 5) Crystal is basking in the sun for me via Twitter, never you mind if she's playing hooky or not. :)

Oh! and 6) I'm actually happy about the layoff now. I'm thrilled to be getting out of here, with severance. You see, I have plans for that money.

Edit for accuracy: We still need our official notice but, as long as I stick it out until June 30th, I should be all good w/regards to severance.

And 7) My doctor's office (HMO) is ridiculously awesome. I emailed asking for an appt next Tuesday am. Got a VM that the doc was not in clinic that day, was asked to call back. I called to schedule for a different day but had to hang up before getting through. Found a voice message on my cell phone, 30 minutes later, saying that I was booked for the day/time I originally requested. Oh and, "you can come any time you like, your actual appointment is X:00." They must love me. I want to keep them forever.

I've been doing some research on all applicable benefits that I need to address, secure or continue after the layoff, most of the information I need is available at my employer's website. I've truncated some of the information for clarity's sake. It's very important to make these decisions while I have the luxury of time to think about it because the website explicitly states:

Enroll within the deadlines. If you do not act by the deadlines, you will not be able to purchase the coverage at a later date.

Medical and Dental Plans
Coverage ends on the last day of the month in which you terminate.
* You may elect to continue your coverage for up to 18 months (COBRA). HMO participants who exhaust their initial 18 months of COBRA coverage may be eligible for an additional 18 months under Cal COBRA. Your election must be returned to the Benefits Administration office postmarked within 60 days from your termination date or the date of notification, whichever is later. If you do not elect COBRA within 60 days, the COBRA opportunity is forfeited. You will pay the full premium plus a 2% administrative fee.

~ It'd be ideal for me to schedule my last day in the first week of the month if I have a choice. (Doubt it). If I leave due to securing new employment, I should not *fingers crossed* need to worry about COBRA. I'll keep the paperwork on hand anyway, just in case.

Something I did NOT know before: according to this New York Times article, I should try to wait until the end of the election period to take COBRA to avoid paying for those two months of coverage if possible. If it turns out I needed coverage in Month 1.5 post layoff, I can just make up the two months' worth of premiums and still be covered. I will, of course, check with the benefits department to make sure that's true. And get it in writing. :)

Life Insurance
Group coverage ends on the last day of the month in which you terminate. Coverage may be converted without evidence of insurability if you apply within 31 days of termination.

~ If I haven't selected outside insurance by that date, then I'll convert. For the time being, I'll apply for supplemental insurance at 5X my current salary in case I want to take it with me. The life insurance quotes I'm getting aren't so attractive.

Accidental Death and Dismemberment Insurance
Coverage ends on the last day of the month in which you terminate. Conversion to an individual plan must be made within 31 days of termination.

~ Do I really need this?

Long Term Care
Coverage through payroll deduction ends the last day of the month in which you terminate. You can continue coverage by making a direct payment to the insurance company. Your premium remains the same. Contact the carrier directly within 31 days of termination to convert to direct billing.

~ Continuing negotiations with my dad. Better make it snappy!

Old Retirement Plan
If you have satisfied the vesting requirement and the present actuarial value of your benefit is less than $5,000 when you terminate employment, you will need to take action regarding your benefit. If you do not take action regarding your benefit, we will cash out your money to you if the value is $1,000 or less. If the value is $1,001 to $5,000, we will rollover your money into an IRA. If the value is more than $5,000, you cannot receive payment or rollover the benefit but will receive retirement benefits based on its value when you retire.

~ Vesting was dependent on 5 years of employment so I wasn't counting on this. It was funded entirely by my employer so I wouldn't be out of pocket but when I got in touch with the plan supervisor, she told me I was auto-vested when they changed our plan. Nice! I will roll it over directly into my Vanguard account, but she won't tell me how much it's worth until I know that my time here is done.

Current Retirement Plan
Your contribution to the Retirement Plan will be taken from your final paycheck. Supplemental Retirement Plan contributions are not taken automatically. Contact your investment company or your benefits office to discuss options regarding your retirement account.

~ Simple, I have enough in the these accounts to maintain my relationship with Vanguard after separation.

Flexible Spending Accounts (FSA)
You may submit claims for eligible dependent care services incurred through the end of the calendar year in which you terminate. You will be reimbursed up to the amount remaining in your account. Expenses submitted for reimbursement must be incurred prior to your termination unless you elect COBRA continuation of your health care FSA on an after-tax basis.

~ Will make sure to be seen by all my doctors, have prescriptions filled, and costs reimbursed before we're outta here. Doesn't make sense that I would continue FSA on an after-tax basis since the point is that it's a pre-tax benefit.

Tuition Assistance
If you leave during a semester, you will receive a pro-rated fee bill and are responsible for paying the cost of tuition for the remainder of the semester.

~ N/A for me. Unfortunately, I never took advantage of this benefit.

Looking back, I've been quite blessed to have such comprehensive benefits even if I didn't fully maximize all of them. Other than the health care, the tuition reimbursement could have paid the largest dividends over time in terms of furthering my career if I could have made time to attend classes. On the other hand, I did manage to earn a major raise by working my butt off instead of taking classes, which was hugely critical to my ability to pay the bills, pay down debt, and save so much. If I can land another job with similar benefits, I will definitely take advantage of free (though taxed) education!

After the hike yesterday, my joints are rather sore and I'm in need of some resting up to head off a major 'ritis flare-up. Therefore, health day!

The shoulder has been out of whack for a long time, so I'm getting that worked on today. We'll have a late lunch of cheese pizza and salad, and catch up with some old friends.

The Futility Fund (administered by Vanguard) was infused with the Rollover Contribution, finally. That's $800+ down that drain. :)

I'm still waiting for that last insurance reimbursement check from the credit card company, though. Should call and find out what's taking them s'darned long this time.

Hope everyone else is having a fabulous day!

I'm ready for a nap. Was up at 8:30 to make an errand run, having only 0.5 L bottles about, and thought I might pick up some TJ's snacks. The snacks were a no-go but I did escape Target with a lovely new water bottle. I wanted the first one, but got the second one in blue because the shelves were understocked.

It's actually cooler than I gave it credit for. Had wanted a very simple, sturdy bottle without straw/spout/drinking enabling device, but the pop-up straw worked better than expected ($10.50). It's a good thing I tend to fall more in love with things after I acquire them.

They had Club crackers for $2.40/box, half the grocery store price, so I grabbed a box of original and multigrain. Made it out of Target in under $15 bucks, and 15 minutes -- not bad at all.

The day-rate parking permit was $5, and it took us about 20 minutes (?) to get up to the parking area. We thought we were going to take the trail up to the ski lift area, but completely missed the turnoff because there was snow everywhere. It was awesome!





We also tried to convince my friend, who wanted to go way past the point of our endurance/snowshoeing capabilities that these were bear tracks.


She didn't buy it, but after promising that everyone would go buy hiking boots and come back next weekend, she agreed to come back down the mountain. Thank goodness, I'm way too out of shape to be doing a major 10 mile hike along something called the Devil's Backbone our first time out this year. Let's work up to that, shall we?

I think we probably did a good 3 miles or so up the wrong trail, with a steepish grade, slogging through snow, slush, ice and mud. My toes are rather grateful that we let up when we did, the ground was so uneven and slippery, I'm surprised no one fell.

Also, we all picked up "walking sticks" along the trail which were a joke at first but came in handy as the snow got deeper and slicker. This was my trusty trail assistant:


I'm looking forward to going out again, and next time I'll be sure to eat a real breakfast beforehand. Eating only a snack wasn't the smartest planning, but it sure made my bacon cheeseburger with crispety, melt-in-your-mouth bacon, and side of fries seem like pure heaven by 3 in the afternoon! ($6.50)

Day's total: $27

1) Want to save more. How can I save more? (Assuredly, this period of binge-saving will be followed by a period of purge-spending. Just came off that spell a couple days ago.)
Thanks to the recent spate of car activity, monthly expenses have come down by $500. That's why the expense fund seems so robust. That can be directed to savings right away. What else can I cut out?

2) If the period of unemployment lasts through, say, the end of the year, I'll have missed out a lot on retirement contributions. The goal is to have a lot of cash in the cushion, but what if some of that cash were stashed? Not too much of it, but an uptick in contributions seems like a good idea. It's the opposite of DCA - investing in large lumpy sums for the next three months in anticipation of none at all from July through December, but I think it's better than nothing at all.

3) Speaking of stashing, what about diversification? Ought I revisit the trad/Roth IRAs? There's still time for 08 and 09 contributions.

During this period of uncertainty, cash certainly reigns (and yes, I still want my 50K of savings for lack of a more secure position) but there's always an itch to earn more than sub-2% interest rates.

Last night's trot 'round to the Fresh 'n' Easy turned up a 4-pack of "snacking apples," 4 for $0.75 marked down from $2.89. They were a bit over a pound, so that's not a bad per pound price.

Also, the red russets were 3 lbs for $2.88. On the pricier side until checkout revealed a $1.88 price tag.

Certainly not a comprehensive shop, but it was a quickie run, primarily for a fruit for lunch tomorrow. Meant to grab a couple of the monster-sized burritos at $2 per, they looked to be at least 1.5 pounds but I couldn't be sure they would last the weekend for next week's meals and I'm not sure that I wanted them for the weekend. All told, never came near to using the $2 off coupon. (Minimum purchase, $10).

Under what circumstances would you feel comfortable accepting monetary assistance?

I was recently asked, why, if the benefactor was willing and able, can I not accept help? That question meant monetary help, and that's a critical difference from all other kinds of help, so that's the part we're going to address today.

During a conversation about the economy, the state of my career, and rather justifiable (in my mind) anxiety that I might be flat broke 12 months from the date I'm laid off, this rather potent question was asked. And I floundered in answering.

Because I can't stand the taste of humble pie? Because I've not asked for money since I was 17? Because if I can't stand on my own, I would still like to have my pride? In this last reason, I'm staunchly my father's daughter, even despite the grief that's brought me in his practice of it.

The truth is, it's all of that and more. It's that I would only think of myself as "needing help" if I were in truly dire straits. If I couldn't afford the rent, the bills, the groceries. I wasn't brought up specifically with this particular insane independent streak, but I've developed the mindset that it's simply unfathomable to think that I would ask for money if I weren't at the end of my resources. Arriving at that point, however, means that there's a whole world of guilt and uncertainty involved. I wouldn't need small sums of money, it's not just spotting me a tenner for lunch. It's rent, it's gas, it's insurance, it's big money.

In my personal experience with money and people, you cannot rely on others for your basic needs: you stand or die alone. That's not true for everyone, though, and I realize that from the outside, it looks like arrogance. (At least one friend has interpreted it that way.) After all, I always step up and help others to the best of my abilities. It may not take the form of cash but it's still help. How then, do I lack such faith in good people and insist on such isolationist responsibility?

I'm casting about for a better understanding of the mentality that allows me to be liberal in my giving, and highly conservative in my getting. Does this attitude need adjusting? If so, how do I remain true to my bootstrapping principles, while recognizing when it's appropriate to accept assistance? Or is the second fear, that it's a slippery slope from asking for help when needed to asking for help all the time, justified?

*Note: One rather astute friend pointed out another way to look at it: if asking for and accepting help is so foreign or unfathomable, then I can trust that I will do everything in my power to prevent that situation from developing. At least there's that.

**Another Note: Perhaps I'm uncomfortable with having to be on the receiving end of this conversation.

Just because the act of writing supposedly helps commit things to memory, or at least to the internet server for later access, let's make this official:

Life would be easier if I owned a nice little can opener. Not that using the grungy, rust-caked, creaky can opener in our "kitchen" at work will kill me outright, but if a slow death-by-food-and-other poisoning can be avoided with a cute gadget, I'm all for it. And if it can't be cute, then clean, functional, and RA- friendly are acceptable attributes.

Life would include a heck of a lot more mac 'n' cheese, and by default be better, if I owned a cheese grater. It's just so hard to decide between graters, slicers, grater/slicer, 6 in one graters, etc. They all seem like a good idea. A fine, cheese-enabling idea.

**I'm getting forgetful in my current state of mind: it's been almost a week and I still haven't submitted a new FSA claim form for the latest batch of sickie supplies.

Most of them were for the weekend, but one was specifically for tonight.

Tonight, at 9 pm, a walking expedition to the local Fresh 'n' Easy was scheduled. Armed with a $2 off $10 or $5 off $20 coupon, a foray into the after-hours discounted produce and possibly other meal components was meant to bear much fruit and even veggies for the lunches of tomorrow and tomorrower.

As we all know, I don't like the scurvy.

Instead, held captive by Dr. Gregory House on Hulu.com and the ice-cold (45-degrees for the layperson who knows of winter) winds, huddled in the room stayed I. No fresh bought comestibles, no provender, for my lunch tomorrow.

Luckily, leftovers shall be the saving of me. There's some meatloaf from Sunday's lunch that will serve admirably. Perhaps also a can of corn. Perhaps I'll be that adventurous. Better luck tomorrow.

Sometimes, I think I'll never understand my parents. In some ways, they seem just like kids.

Our lines of parenthood and daughterhood have become blurred, redrawn, fuzzed over, drawn again and scuffed up. That happens with most relationships, I think, over time, so I'm not worried that it's happened. It's just a little whelming to try and prepare for the future only to hear my dad tell me that they'll be fine at this rather subsistence level of living because, "Everyone else does it, and what would we do with luxury anyway?"

Uh, having basic health needs met in a timely manner is a luxury? Having to wait 4-6 months to have your general physician get back to you about rescheduling a follow-up is acceptable? Therefore, long term care insurance is a luxury? Maybe I've become spoiled, but my idea of basic health insurance does not mean the same thing as it does to them. They've become accustomed to the kind of care available to the indigent, and I don't want that to be the rest of their lives.

Aside from that, let's be honest here: the insurance is helpful to me and my sanity. We come as a pair, you don't want us separated. As I've pointed out before, my dad is mom's primary caretaker. I bring in the income. So if anything happens to dad? This already precarious house of cards come tumblin' down.

I get that he doesn't want me to be paying out more money, I get that he doesn't want me "risking" any more. But I don't get the logic of "don't create a cushion for later on by spending a small amount now." Talk about penny-wise, pound-foolish. Either he's simply lost all perspective and today's dollar is worth way more than tomorrow's ten (and sanity, and breathing space) or he just doesn't want to quit smoking.

At this point, I just hope it's the latter.

Related reading links:
Lazy Man and Money's Helping Parents Cope with Damage to Their Retirement Nest Egg

Shouldn't be bloggin', I know, it's just boring waiting for Shutterfly to upload the darned pictures.

The shower went off swimmingly, I think, but I couldn't tell from the vantage point of organizing and decorating and shuttling gifts.

She got some really cool stuff, like two Boppy pillows. She can stack them for sleeping "on" her stomach, or tall folks can stack 'em when they hold the baby.

I'm so glad a girlfriend prebaked a batch of cupcakes, everyone decorated a few and ate most of the rest. There won't be any left for the dudes who'll be coming back from their Man Expedition, but that's just too bad!

I hope everyone else had a great Sunday! I'm ready for a nap.

So@24's post from a while back about family cracked me up.

I don't know if your family is the same way, but mine takes all kinds of liberties when it comes to the subject of family and marriage. By that I mean, every possible bit of advice and nosiness that can be mustered is brought into play like a cannonade of good intentions. The latest?

Eldest Auntie: R, how old are you this year?
R: .... 26.....
EA: What? 27? 28?
R: [just opening my mouth to respond]
EA: Yes yes, ok, that's old enough, you can get married now. Don't wait until you're 30, you're old enough now! Don't wait until you're 30, y'hear?
R: ....... But ....... I ....... *sigh* [shake head in defeat] Yes, auntie.

Because really, what can you honestly say? And besides that, what's the point? My family, like Dalmatians, can just go selectively deaf. There's no point in responding.

Auto insurance refunds:
$115, check received
$153, check requested

Policy Premium increase:
$142, lovely

Still to be determined:
Car payout, less the $500 deductible, less any assessed decrease in value, less the remaining loan amount.

The check should be arriving sometime this week, and we can begin car hunting in earnest. Sharing is caring, but sharing a car all the time makes for crazy.

These are the flowers my friend should be receiving this afternoon, and I thought I'd share a little of their gorgeous cheer.

In the last hour, I've:

~ organized my schedule for the week, and pulled together some information for my conference call
~ called aunt/uncle to update and clarify baby shower plans
~ called friend to wish her Happy Birthday, clarified baby shower plans
~ emailed friend to ask her about hunting down her brother, also baby shower related
~ emailed co-conspirator about baby advice book for, yep, baby shower
~ spoke to expectant grandparents about baby shower and baby book
~ locked myself out of my timekeeping system
~ called for help with timekeeping system, no luck
~ called WAMU Investments for my final balance: 778.49 Eeesh.
~ ordered flowers for grieving friend. She just lost her father last week, and her husband was diagnosed with kidney cancer in the same week. There has to be something more I can do for her.


There are still a million things to be done:
~ shopping for the baby shower
~ setting up the templates for the baby advice/photobook
~ collecting everyone's parenting advice (if anyone has anything to share with a very nervous, expectant mother, I would love to include it!)
~ shopping for the mommy-to-be so she has something that's for just her, and not All About Baby (I'm thinking of a Sephora gift card, but that's about all I can come up with unless I can locate a spa near here. Thoughts, anyone?)
~ my educational project needs to be researched and worked on
~ have a meeting with my new tutor one evening this week
~ a class to attend tomorrow, so almost all my work for tomorrow has to be completed today

~ Complete as many Professional Development classes as possible. I might, if I stay employed through April and get off the wait list for one set of classes, manage to get enough classes in before the layoff to complete my Certificate in Management. *cross your fingers for me!*

~ If there's space, or I get de-waitlisted, I'd like to take Excel and Illustrator classes. We'll see about approval.

~ A friend's fiance is a freelance web designer who is willing to teach me web design and programming skills. Whoo! I'm calling it an "apprenticeship" for now, I'll do work for him, he'll teach me how, and maybe when I get good, he'll hire me on! We'll see. For now, I want to learn some basics since I'm pretty clueless. It'll come in handy here and professionally.

~ In other good news, when they changed our retirement plan last July, we were automatically vested. So whenever the axe falls, I get to roll whatever little money accrued from my first two years into my existing retirement plan. Since I didn't contribute anything, it should be qualified for a relatively hassle free rollover. It's good for a few hundred, I figure. I just hope that it can also be sent into my 403(b) as well. (Hope hope hope).

~ Do the math. Well-Heeled reminded me that if I do that math, unemployment will cover a good amount of my household expenses, even with 3.5 people. So I can breathe a little easier knowing that my e-fund will last longer than previously anticipated. (Now I have to do the math to see how much longer that means.)

~ Need to settle the final details and applications for: renter's insurance, long term care insurance, life insurance, safety deposit box, my will. Whatever I can get employer rates on (LTC, for one) and is portable is a priority.

Not only is WAMU still charging the stupid $25 annual fee for 2009, they're also charging a $75 distribution fee, costing my already depleted IRA fund a total of $100 in fees. Unbelievable. At this rate, I'll be lucky to retain half the value of my original contributions. Then again, I only had several months to contribute at that employer after I turned 21, and before I quit, so it wasn't a huge amount of money to begin with.

I would have balked, and did mentally, but sting though it might, this is the smarter long-term choice. Paying a hundred dollars now to roll the remaining money into my current employer's plan under Vanguard is the equivalent of 4 years' worth of annual fees. That money better be sitting in the retirement account for much longer than 4 more years! That's my breakeven point.

This should have been done as soon as I established my retirement plan with the current employer, but I didn't realize that it could be incorporated into my 403(b) without tax implications. In retrospect, it's already cost me more than a hundred dollars in fees (a $40 distribution fee was charged when I first rolled it over). This is for keeps because I'm signed up for Vanguard's emailing service which eliminates annual fees on my accounts and I have enough money in Vanguard to just keep it there once I leave this employer.

Just another stupid tax from back when I didn't know to look out for fees charged for moving my money around. Come to think of it, I was shocked by the $40 distribution fee back in 2004, and could have sworn that I asked about it, but cannot for the life of me remember what the answer was. The cost of naivete and inexperience.